Please don’t envy me.
Don’t assume that happiness is found in a dinner companion. Despite everything, I am sad and confused and broken-hearted.
When your heart belongs to Girl #1, what do you do when Girl #2 comes along? How can you enjoy your time with Girl #2 when you're preoccupied with Girl #1, and you wish that Girl #1 could be here now because she would like this and she would have a funny joke to tell? And you know that your feelings for Girl #1 will sabotage your chances with Girl #2, even though your brain tells you to forget about Girl #1, but it’s not that easy?
What do you do when you finally come-to-terms with your feelings for Girl #1—several months too late? And you express these feelings to Girl #1, only to find out that she felt that way too, but now you’ve missed your chance, and at this point she’d rather just be friends? And she depends on your friendship, because who else does she have? But you know that you can't be a good friend to her because you lust after her, and when you're alone with her all you can think about is kissing her, but she needs someone to talk to? And you don't want to destroy your friendship, but—damn it—you feel like you'll explode unless you stop seeing her?
What do you do when you can’t eat and you can’t sleep and you can’t work, and you ditch your friends on a Saturday night to nurse your aching heart? Which is a bad idea for obvious reasons, but you can't bear to see her tonight. And you have these shreds of hope, but you wish you didn’t and you could just see what happens with Girl #2 but who really gives a shit as long as Girl #1 has remote potential?
And you wish you weren’t so dramatic, but what can you do? And you vow to never become friends with a woman ever again, because it destroys your chances for romance, but that’s a really immature thing to think?
So you go to the mall with Girl #2, but you can’t stop thinking about Girl #1, and you realize that you have what are known as "options". And some people might envy your "options", and you would gladly hand-over the whole mess to their custody if you could.